And you know what I've just realised...

I was watching stuff on youtube (I do that a lot) and you know what I've just realised - this is never going to take off. No one is ever going to read this. This will not be another Julie and Julia Project thingy-m-jig. Because that doesn't happen to me. Nothing good ever happens.

It's unbelievable how I managed to go from all yeah! about the Welcome pack to all eugh! about this is less than half an hour. Now I suppose you understand the title. Despondent. Despondency. I seriously need to go to the doctors before this becomes an actual issue.

And even though I really want to publish this I'm thinking that's kinda a bad idea - hey look, let's check out that blog *reads* dear lord the blogger's depressed! I do not want to see/read what happens to her tomorrow. See ya!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And now I've just realised that I shouldn't be bothered if no one reads this or not. But it's a blog, it's a global diary. If I wanted no one to read it I would have just writted a diary! Dear Lord, I really need to get a life